Day 4

Has the world been passing by today?

It would seem I've forgotten to notice.

A sad truth of my life:

I'm eternally tormented by the inability to take my no-eyes off the Hell around me.

But today, for some reason, as I look down this red carpet--

I can't seem to take them off Grace.

Day 3.2

Finally Sissy-face did something to blog home about.

He solved it!

Jerk.

Dark Lord, that salute gets messy.

I can never tell who's screwing it up.

Obviously.

But don't look at me.

Apparently Sisyphus had a champion in the crowd today.

A woman. Tee-hee.

She'd better not get her hopes up.

*WINK*

I guess the only thing left to say about today is:

Whyyyyy???

Day 3

Day 3(000,000,000,000)?

I noticed so many men dressed like Sisyphus going by today.

I'd like to see more of them pushing a giant Sphere.

Loved the woman in purple with the lap dog.

I was hoping she would offer me some.

Seriously.

Famished.

There was a blonde girly boy at the table checking me out.

I shall remember his beautiful face for all eternity.

Day 2.2

I think I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

But seriously.

No, I don't at all.

There was a delightful bear in the front row with a handsome and swarthy paramour.

Now here's what is fun about being dead:

I can see through clothing.

And that delightful bear has a tattoo on his belly.

Of Sisyphus!

True story.

Well. Not the seeing-through-clothes part.

I only know about the tattoo because he told me about it.

In a post on NoFacebook.

"LIKE"

I wonder if he knows that down here in Hell no one can prevent forest fires.

Day 2

Rapture of raptures!

Another mythically interminable ride on the red carpet.

With America's next top Roll Model.

So can we talk about the enthralled hottie sitting down front?

Sizzle.

But what chance does a disembodied curmudgeon have with the likes of him?

Not a snowball's chance in Hell.

Did I see Dante in the back row?

How did he get parolled?

Jerk.

Did it reek of brimstone today or was that just me?

Oh crap.

It's just me.

It said strong enough for a man yet made for a woman.

I totally thought it said:

Strong enough for a man yet made for a Minion.

Not the first time that's even happened!

ROFLMAO.

Suggestion:

Keep your eyeballs.

Lose your teeth if you must lose something.

But keep your eyeballs.

*WINK*

Day 1.2

Holy hell.

Today was an eternity.

Wait.

What is eternity but one long day?

In case you were wondering, hell is indeed paved with concrete.

My back hurts more today than it did during the Spanish Inquisition.

What's up with that?

There was a pigeon.

A star-craved pigeon.

Ten bucks says it was Hades.

Jerk.

I tried not to make eye contact and then relaxed when I remembered I have no eyes.

Honestly, the pigeon just made me remember how hungry I was.

Also there was a strangely timid squeak of an infant's toy.

This also left me feeling hungry.

LOL.

Day 0

It felt like I was in an old movie.

Running around trying to catch a baby falling from a fifth story window.

Holding the Step and Repeat is boring as hell.

But I guess voyeurism is participation.